PAUL RANTS

Posted by Paul at December 27th, 2006

James Brown was twenty years younger than Gerald Ford and worked right up until his death on Christmas day. Ford retired thirty years ago, when Jimmy Carter took over as president, and went on to play golf in Palm Springs. James Brown was known as the “hardest working man in show business.” Gerald Ford was the only unelected US president in history and served only a few years. James Brown was a ground breaking musician and performer who inspired millions. Ford pardoned disgraced felon Richard Nixon and was a member of the largely ceremonial Warren Commission. Brown’s anthem Say It Loud (I’m Black and I’m Proud) effectively ended black people being referred to as ‘colored.’ Ford’s drug addicted wife founded a rehab center for rich people. Brown had the misfortune (for us) to die the day before Ford, who fostered the executive careers of Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld. Now the cable news stations are running wall to wall coverage of the dead x-president, scrambling for any tid bits to flesh out Ford’s uneventful tenure. Solution: turn the sound off and put on some James Brown, The Godfather of Soul. Better yet, turn off the TV, and get up… get on up…

And then there’s this…

To be fair, there’s also this…

Posted by Paul at December 26th, 2006

Bush goes on the hunt for a good lawyer

In the coming months the commander-in-chief must answer for the thousands of lives and billions in fortune spent in Iraq to overthrow a dictator and spark a brutal civil war. The killing has long ago surpassed anything Saddam Hussein ever perpetrated to hold power. Now Saddam will hang, and the power vacuum swirls with Shiite militias, Saudi supported Sunni death squads, and a two-faced central government.

Of course, unlike Saddam, Bush won’t hang. But as the above article points out, he has started to surround himself with legal counsel who will have quite a job on their hands defending what, once the rhetoric and obfuscations are cleared away, amount to war crimes in service of a corporate driven neocon agenda. Congressional hearings will attempt to reveal the fabrications used to wage an extremely profitable war (if you’re a corporation, that is. If you’re a taxpayer, you’re fucked). Then there’s the unchecked subversion of Geneva conventions. Government sanctioned torture (That phrase openly associated with the United States of America, never in my wildest nightmares would I have imagined). So at this late date, as Bush ignores the advice of the joint chiefs of staff and the generals in the field, as even some of his staunch neocon allies fade away, it must be dawning on him that he’s painted himself into a dark corner. The evangelicals are reevaluating, with Tom Delay spending tax dollars to fete industry on an island where abortions are forced; with the maiming of some of our finest troops; with the dead and soon to be killed. But the president must now stand naked before the nation and account for his disastrous policies (But not before one last “surge” of misdirection, of course). We can’t fix what the Bush administration already broke and allowed to fester. But we can account for what went wrong, by whom, and for what gain.

SEE BUSH FALL (cont’d)

UPDATE: US to send more troops to Gulf

Posted by Paul at December 23rd, 2006

Lawmaker Fears ‘More Muslims’ in Congress

Congressman Virgil Goode (R-Evangelical) has his heart in the right place — just not his brain — when he fears that those of the same religion as the 9/11 highjackers would enter congress. Of course what Goode (pronounced Goode) should be concerned about is ideology, not religion. We have a little thing here in the United States known as freedom of religion. Goode might want to look that one up, being that he’s a member of congress and all.

When Goode intimates that the bible is the only book on which you can be sworn in, even ceremoniously, and that Muslims in general should not be allowed in congress, he, like the 9/11 highjackers, is expressing an ideology. It is the peculiar anomally of the now lame duck 109th congress that the ideology of evangelicals be openly represented as if it came from the founding fathers. The constitution Congressman Goode is sworn to uphold takes a backseat to his radical exclusionary views; though not as violent as the views of the 9/11 highjackers, they are equally anti-American.

UPDATE: But It’s Thomas Jefferson’s Koran!

Posted by Paul at December 22nd, 2006

• a vat of shredded turkey meat swimming in brine
• light green and beige paste purported to be tabouli
• Martinelli’s sparkling grape cider (no bottle opener)
• a giant tin filled with charred black chicken legs
• beet pie with mayonnaise frosting and pomegranate seeds
• sashimi salad from SUSHI PLANET (nice…)
• some otherwise tasty looking roasted potatoes — completely flavorless
• pigs in a blanket
• a wheel of peanutbutter fudge (finger food, apparently — no knife or spatula)

Besides sampling the potatoes, sashimi salad, and finger fudge, I actually ate a portion of one of the charred chicken legs. The meat underneath the blackened skin was dry but not inedible. I’m still trying to erase the image of the beet pie from my mind… A drawing was held in which I had the small fortune to win a ‘breakfast-in-a-box,’ — a small packet of waffle batter and a bottle of blueberry syrup (excellent for re-gifting).

Another thing regarding the holidays: Christmas wreaths on the front grilles of SUVs. Who are these people? As soon as late November rolls around it’s, “Come on Buffy, let’s festoon the Range Rover with holly and mistletoe!” They’re so excited they have to take their holiday cheer mobile. Want to be selfless and loving this Christmas? Keep your decorations to yourself. Not everyone gets all warm and fuzzy this time of year.

Ho, ho, ho.

Posted by Paul at December 19th, 2006

Dennis Kucinich for President 2008

Eight years of neo-conservative rule have left no choice but to endorse liberal congressman Dennis Kucinich for president in ‘08. Kucinich has a stellar record and was one of the few in congress to vote against the disastrous neocon adventure known as Operation Iraqi Freedom. True, he doesn’t have Barack Obama’s untarnished star power or Hillary Clinton’s poll-driven political savvy. What he does have is loads of rolled-up-sleeves experience fighting the neocon agenda as well as the fortitude to stick to his core values. The unlikely event of Kucinich in the white house would mean really setting a tone for change; to address the needs of the all important but neglected middle class; and most importantly, to push the blood sucking military industrial agenda to the back burner where it belongs.

Could he get there? It’s doubtful with the high profile contenders he’s up against in both parties. But the election is nearly two years away and stranger things have happened (Hey, George W. Bush got elected twice). Certainly the Democratic candidate with the most government experience and the most integrity has a reasonable chance at this point. Especially if he teams himself with someone experienced in foreign policy and anti-terrorism. It seems the other candidates can only fall from favor; Kucinich can only rise. What we really need in ‘08 is the anti-Bush, and Kucinich is it.

The pendulum must swing.

Posted by Paul at December 13th, 2006

‘Convert or Die’ game divides Christians

You’d think it was only radical Islam that took religious intolerance to new extremes. But do they have a video game? No, it took radical American Christianity to come up with something so blatantly intolerant yet media friendly, perfect for the young Christian fascist video gamer in your home. Thrill at your own superiority as you vaporize non-believers and ascend to the Kingdom of Heaven. Now on sale at Walmart (where else?), just in time for Christmas.

The Convert or Die video game is a spin off of the popular Left Behind book series which takes a clear stand between non-believers and those who will try to convert them (before wasting them, of course). Just what Jesus had in mind, I’m sure: teaching impressionable young people to hate those who disagree with them, violently. And they don’t even have to blow themselves up to do it.

Posted by Paul at December 10th, 2006

50 Cent: ‘Winfrey’s Turned White’

So…watch a lot of Oprah, do ya 50? Did you catch the one where she gave makeovers to homeless ladies? Did you love that or what? Hey, you and your crew ought to throw a Oprah watching party — and make it a potluck! That would really be fabulous. You know what else? You’re so on the money — Oprah ought to have more rap artists on her show. The hip hop crowd must be a gigantic part of her demographic. What is up with that? She’s been on TV for twenty years and y’all been right there for the child abuse victims and the fashion previews, just eatin’ that shit up. Just waitin’ for her to bust out with some hip hop. Why the fuck does she only play to white ladies in middle America, anyway? Just because it’s mostly them watching and shit. Man, you are right about her… By the way, how much you gave to charities in Africa? Build any schools there? Donated to any African American universities? Provide any low cost housing for any inner city families lately? No? But, man, those diamond encrusted rims on your Escalade are poppin’! 50, you are right: If Oprah don’t start bustin’ out with some hip hop she’s just straight up cream filled like a ding dong, know what I’m sayin’?

Posted by Paul at December 9th, 2006

Re: the Iraq Study Group:

Let’s not forget that James Baker is the Bush family consiglieri and an old colleague of Dick Cheney. Whether or not the president follows the Baker Commission’s advice on Iraq, real policy change over a year from now is just an idea at this point. Why are we so impressed with what the president’s family attorney thinks is the right thing to do, anyway? This situation warrants an independent Iraq Study Group (that would be the 110th congress). By the way, you can’t tell me The Baker Commission has no interests in the inflated contracting and oil revenues. So what authority do they really have? Baker is there to buy time for a cornered commander-in-chief and family business partner, who, like a petulant child, is not in the mood to play nice.

Posted by Paul at December 7th, 2006

As the tall front line striker on his fire station volleyball team, veteran Los Angeles fireman Tennie Pierce — Big Dog to his friends — would hunker down at the net and call for the volleyball: “Feed the Big Dog! Feed the Big Dog!”

Besides sports, Pierce and the other guys in the firehouse would sometimes engage in frat boy pranks and hazing. Most of us who aren’t firemen can’t understand the need to release acute stress and boredom through such childish means as shaving someone’s genitals. Gladly participating in that prank and others was Big Dog Pierce, right along with the rest of the guys.

One day, the other firemen decided to play a prank on Big Dog. As a nineteen year veteran, the time for something big had come. They thought about his personality, how he expressed himself at play. “Feed the Big Dog!” — that was it. They would feed the Big Dog. So they got some dog food and mixed it into his spahgetti. A truly disgusting and childish prank, indeed.

It wasn’t recieved well. In fact, Tennie Big Dog Pierce, goaded by Los Angeles City Attorney Rocky Delgadillo, wanted 2.7 million of our tax dollars for the bad taste in his mouth. The Los Angeles City Council gave it to him. The Mayor compromised with the ensuing outcry and Big Dog Pierce — he vetoed the reward and banned hazing. A chastened City Council upheld the Mayor’s veto. So now City Attorney Delgadillo, a man with nothing more important to do apparently, is taking the matter to a higher court, where even more money could be rewarded.

Welcome to the wacky world of liberal big city politics.

Posted by Paul at December 6th, 2006

Baker Commission recommends troops out of Iraq by ‘08

It took losing congress to get Bush/Cheney to lend an ear to the Baker Commission. Meanwhile, more death and debt for all. So why couldn’t Dick Cheney figure any of the Baker Commission’s recommendations out for himself? I thought he was Bush’s foreign policy genius. Apparently he’s just his war profiteering genius. Hey Mr. Cheney, do you think you can avert some of those inflated contracting and oil profits to help pay down the national debt you helped run up to record levels? How about just the four hundred billion squandered in Iraq? No? I didn’t think so.

Cheney is beholden to the many contractors (100,000+) and oil fields (2nd largest supply in middle east) in Iraq. He is beholden to the military industrial complex he oversees. Dwight Eisenhower would have had him court-martialed. Being fiscally responsible and quelling the peripheral chaos are not high on his agenda. Cheney and his corporate cabal consolidate power and cash in on the misery of others, at the taxpayers expense. He should step aside immediately. What a disgrace… Oh, and don’t try travelling, Dick. The rest of the world still considers being a war criminal/profiteer illegal.